PAUL

Some things
We mere mortals
Aren’t meant to understand
Like the bitter sting of death
Suicidal breath
Depression
Darkest demons
Dancing all around us
Human pain transcends
As evil tramples life
Addiction is a bitch my friends
I know this monster well
One cannot fathom hopelessness
Until we have survived it
The art of life is love
Brotherhood
Random acts of kindness
Grace from God above
We only need to LOVE…….
Support one another
Smile
And very often
The true meaning of our quest
I celebrate my Brother
A kind, artistic man
Filled with love to give
So quick to forgive
No more torment Paul
It’s all behind you now
I miss you
But rejoice
As you hear the angel’s voice
See you on the other side
You live within my heart
We’ll meet again someday
When its time…….

© Bill Grimes Jr. 2009

An old post from 2005.......it seems appropriate to share it again now.........

MERRY CHRISTMAS




“And it came to pass in those days, that there went out a decree from Caesar Augustus, that the world should be taxed”
This was the social climate in ancient Nazareth preceding the birth of Jesus Christ
I find the timing of this mandate fascinating
Global taxation by force
As our Lord and Savior was born
Today
The United Nations aggressively seeks to impose a similar global tax
“Millennium Declaration”
Sweeping list of One World objectives
To be achieved by 2015
Coincidence?
None in God’s creation
Revival of the Roman Empire?
So many similarities accompany the quest for New World Order
“For unto you is born this day in the city of David, a Savior, which is Christ the Lord”
As Christmas Day approaches in the year 2005
I cringe at the mockery surrounding this blessed event
Commercialism
Greed
Censure
Thankful Christians
Forbidden to mention His Holy name!
Biblical scholars may disagree on the exact date in history
Myself,
I celebrate Him EVERYDAY
I praise His saving grace
Salvation given so freely
My message to you all
As this society rapidly deteriorates
MERRY CHRISTMAS
HE LIVES
“Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, good will toward men”


Luke Chapter 2


© Bill Grimes Jr. 2005

SENTIMENTAL THOUGHTS

Raw emotion
Lost in the shuffle
Wasted on a fleeting glimpse
Not looking for approval
Fifty years along
The irony
Only makes me smile
First day of November
Never dreamed I’d live this long
Nor did I wish to
I ponder sentimental thoughts
Restless innocence
Mortality
Sub consciousness
It all boils down to faith
Trusting intuition
Aging peace of mind
Jung wrote on colored parchment
Red “Liber Novus”
Mans search for himself
My soul
Never owned by me alone
On loan from God above
A child of His precious love
All guesswork is removed
No psychotherapy needed
Satisfied
I carry on
Following the light…….


© Bill Grimes Jr. 2009

GENIUS

Tenacious Alvin Lee
Distorted facial joy
Ripping red guitar
“Hey Joe” rendition
“I’m going home”
One of Woodstock’s finest hours
Quirky Frank Zappa
His dental floss empire in Montana
Mass hallucinogens
Set the foggy……..trippy tone
Such timeless tunes
Rose above the chemical blitzkrieg
Forty years have past
My body
Still erupts in rhythmic palsy
Lightning bolts still dance along my spine
My how I admire genius
Haunts me to this day
Magic moments in time
Bent
Warped
Elongated
My life
An open book
Quite predictable
For those who care to take a look
I rock
Therefore I am
Always have says Billy Ray
Live to play another day
Survival of the boredom
Share the art with all………


© Bill Grimes Jr. 2009

HE CARED

To bow out gracefully
On second thought
Maybe not
Who really gives a fuck?
Middle aged romantic
Could care less about luck
Riding winds of change
Path of least resistance
Chronic third degree
Watching in amusement
At times
Stark bewilderment
Chronic pain
Albatross indeed
Glowing midnight sun
Screams she is the one
Deepest depths within him
Speechless
He knows better
“She”
Has gone away
No longer wants to play
Social pantomime
Frustrating epilogue
For what it’s worth
He cared
Before his soul lay bare
No fire in her eyes
No substance to her lies
Only sad goodbyes
White empty coffin
Prepared for circumstance
All he wants to do is dance……


© Bill Grimes Jr. 2009

SHELTER

The Stones in 75
Jamming about shelter
Social heat
Began to swelter
A tad bit shy
Of Helter Skelter
High School daze
Chills along my spine
As I relive them on YouTube
Pam’s satin hand
Gently clasped in mine
Feeling fine
Permanent friends
Never to forget
The years have blistered by
Children having children
Concept we call life
Void of obvious strife
It snuck in through the back door
I’ll die a happy man
Knowing it was all a dream
Come true………


© Bill Grimes Jr. 2009

STUFF

Spatial verve
Social disadvantage
Harbinger of joy
Drives his latest toy
Stuff
Can be replaced
No price tag on extortion
To focus on reprieve
So hard to achieve
Legions roam
Bewildered
Shuffling abroad
Begrudgingly applaud
Those who persevere
Epitome of cool
A calculated risk
Lingering kiss
The crux
Of pleasantry


© Bill Grimes Jr. 2009

MAGNIFICENT FLIGHT

Lazy Sunday evening
October 2009
Days of 100 proof
Overkill indeed
So grateful they’re behind me now
Extreme behavior
Trademark of rebellion
Deftly woven
Throughout my DNA
Microscope of truth
Glaring irony
I lived to tell about
Blessings
God’s grand reprieve
Stage set for a showdown
Conscious
Versus ego
The outcome
Preordained
Holy destiny
Not hard to understand
Grace
Effortless gift
Void of mortal pride
I drift
Subtle revelations
Journey to His light
Magnificent flight


© Bill Grimes Jr. 2009

PSYCHO DRAMA

Onset of delusion
Roadmap to insanity
Mighty hill to conquer
For those who see beyond
Life is but a play
Not meant for understanding
Far from picket fences
Three car garages
Elementary rite
Words of ascension
Baby steps required
Aging Narcissism
Replaced by quiet calm
Silent chuckle
Deep inside my soul
I watch with amusement
Follow faithfully
Gradual progress
Satisfaction
Slow
But sweet
Poetic legacy
Blueprint of my trip
My world
Revolves around His grace
As it should be



© Bill Grimes Jr. 2009

NATURAL PROGRESSION (A song of hope)

At times
I feel I’ll buckle
Crumple under crushing loneliness
Misery
Choice of vast proportion
Controlled by my attitude
Blessed with friends aplenty
Strength
Pipeline from divine energy
Hardly worthy
But grateful nonetheless
Distinct rhythm
Flows within my soul
As I’m growing old
This battle
Always takes its toll
But pales
Beside my past mistakes
Harmony I seek
Arrives in increments
Precious sentiments
Warm thoughts
Natural progression
Life as it comes
Love
From the strangest circumstances
New horizon
Clear focus on the prize
Inner peace
Compassionate release
As His light grows ever closer
Sweet emancipation
Approaching rapidly
“I AM the way” said He
Good enough for me


© Bill Grimes Jr. 2009

THE WHY

To ponder consciousness
Altered states
Dreamscape reality
The why
Far outweighs the when
How it all began
Self discipline
Hardly a prerequisite
Merely lubrication
Mental strain prescription
Life
Lived in increments
One day at a time
The only way for me
Weary eyes
Suddenly
Begin to see


© Bill Grimes Jr. 2009

WISDOM

Fame
Fortune
Lame proportions
Reality
So often fails to mirror
Buried fantasy
Seeing things
Not as they appear to be
But as they really are……


© Bill Grimes Jr. 2009

I SHOULD

Alarm clock screams
Startled from a pleasant dream
I urinate
Procrastinate
Ponder why I never question fate
Coffee brewing
Smelling good
Suddenly I realize
Those risks I dare not take
I should….
Life is short amigo
This earthly one at least
His love
True bread of life
Passion
Soulful yeast
The ultimate release……..


© Bill Grimes Jr. 2009

A TICK PAST REGRETFUL

Time must pass
This I know
I don’t care about its passage
Never have my friends
Most likely
I never will
Still
Boredom is my nemesis
Conceptual disillusion
Inconsequential factors
Beyond the ambience
A tick past regretful
Seems so intrusive
For I have no fear of death
Nor Satan’s kicking breath
It’s me I battle daily
Clinging to ghosts of yesterday
Reality
Melancholy passion play
No room for loss of balance
Perched atop a razor blade of chance
I sleep in increments
Dream so vividly
Foster deep thoughts of romance
Practice acts of kindness
Sincerity
The key
Deepest part of me
So it shall be…….


© Bill Grimes Jr. 2009

SONG FOR LINDA

I wrote this song for you
Although I must have dreamed you
Still I am amazed
You have no eyes
For me to analyze
Perhaps a shade of blue

A tale of you and me
Delicious fantasy
Yet saturated
With uncertainty

True love is worth the fight
On this lonely autumn night
Forever
A long…. long time……

Is my soul prepared?
For the sacrifice required
Are you sincere?
The ONE that I desire?

Unconscious suffering
Intellectual bleed
Hope within my brain
Why are you my need?

Experiment in pain
Attraction surreal
Inadvertent mind games
Such rhythm…
Still I feel

Wishing things were different
Somehow…
Things shall all work out
Yet knowing better Linda
My mind floods with doubt


Don’t toy with me dear lady
Coax me down a path that leads to nowhere
For I’m a dreamer too
Much farther gone than you

Fate
A bitch indeed
When it offers no completion
Whether chemical distraction
Or simply mental illness
Screaming for reaction

Closure is an open door
Despite the social dance
Courage to step through it
One never truly knows
If it’s our last chance…….


© Bill Grimes Jr. 2009

VANITY IS A CURSE

Astute observations
Life as I perceive it
Matters not
To those who don’t believe
It simply touches me
In ways I’ll never fully comprehend
To deeply connect
The focus of my journey
Money
Fame
Social fixation
Has never meant a shit
Vanity is a curse
False pretense
Only fools graze in such pastures
Secrets are a cancer
Deceit
So much worse
Honesty
The toughest road in life
Regardless of consequence
Forsaking public opinion
The only true path to freedom
So be it…..

© Bill Grimes Jr. 2009

MY WISH FOR YOU

I pray you find him Mel
The man who adores you
As I always have
Gazes upon you
When you aren’t looking
As if you will break
Fondly nestled
His hands upon your belly
Pulls you so close to him
Just to feel you breathing peacefully
Fascinated
So deeply in love with your spirit
So attracted to your soft and supple touch
Enamored by your tender sweet lips
Genuinely satisfied
To simply BE
Forever by your side………

SACRED ASYLUM (A song about futility)

Lately
My cell phone by my bed
Despite my aching head
Just in case you call
Like so many times before
My throbbing skull
Cannot comprehend
The stark reality
That you never will
Fear is a demon
I’m as sick as my secrets
Today I conquered fear
Your demon flees me now
I’m done with false hope
Definitely
At the end of my rope
Such passionate poetry
Flowing words of depth
Bouncing off indifference
Wasted on hypocrisy
How foolish of me girl
What the hell was I thinking?
As if I were drinking
But far too late to sober up
Dancing in the moonlight
Dreaming by the fire
Humanity
So selfish
Driven by desire
It’s not about the money
Success
No power trips
My soul seeks completion
I need a safe place to hide
Sacred asylum
Void of plasticity
Futility
Pantomime humility
No coincidence my friend
That vain
Rhymes with pain…….


© Bill Grimes Jr. 2009

SECOND CHANCES

Pieces of you
Pieces of me
Possibly a “we”
Joined by common interests
Forced separation
Crossroads are traumatic
At times
A perfect meld
So much wasted passion
Far too many lost second chances
Focus on sincerity
Slowly crush the fear
Keeping love so near

© Bill Grimes Jr. 2009

WOODSTOCK

My soul
Still adolescent
My body
Aging rapidly
My spirit
Free
When I allow it to be
Unencumbered
Still seeking harmony
Quite simply
I’m amazed
Living preordained destiny
Despite my numbered days
Woodstock
Forty years along
Much more than an event
To me
A burning bush
It taught me to express
My deepest true essence
To seek my music muse
Artistic creativity
Social disengagement
“Establishment” distrusts
Lore of vain protest
Chills still dance along my spine
When Hendrix serenades
When Janis cries the blues
When Alvin Lee
Rips “I’m going home”
Call it what you wish my friends
Agree
Or dismiss
Three days of peace and music
August 1969
Forever changed my being
Set my heart afire
And never forget
Stay away from the brown acid
Peace…….



© Bill Grimes Jr. 2009

THANK YOU

A clown cries on the inside
I’m guilty of the same
Living in the deep end
Tripping to a different tune indeed
At times
Victim of my own naivety
Gullible some will say
Trusting nonetheless
I’ve trudged through the fire
Been forced to drink theatrics
Tiptoed through social minefields
Wallowed in self pity
Called hell on earth my home
Please don’t ask me how
I’ll share it with you now
Such drama
Only drags me down
Time to lose the frown
Numb from false mechanics
Bewildered by the lies
Blunt paranoia
Shared by all us puppets
Still I dig the bass line
Ripping guitar riffs
It’s all about the groove
Music is my fix
My soul still comes alive with every beat
Friends with smiling eyes
They fascinate me so
Dancing with sincerity
Penetrating love
Tranquility
Thought of major focus
Today
Forever
Anxiously I wait
His holy paradise
Magnificent
On the other side
God’s master plan
I’m scarred beyond recognition
Unworthy
Certainly soiled
Then gently rebuilt
Crafted in His precious image
It’s hard for me to fathom
Such unconditional grace
After all the bad I’ve done
Quite simple in verity
He saved me from myself
In His loving arms I’ll stay
Thank you Father
Thank you…….


John 15:5 (King James Version)
5I am the vine, ye are the branches: He that abideth in me, and I in him, the same bringeth forth much fruit: for without me ye can do nothing.

© Bill Grimes Jr. 2009

SWEET SIMPLICITY

Stormed the gates of heaven
Passed out
At the very gates of hell
Lived to tell about it
Gods grace thus far
My how I remember
Blowing chunks
Grooving to Grand Funk
Sweet taste of simplicity
Teenage obligations
Financial insecurity
Mississippi’s finest
Red Barn dollar draft
Milk jug pure
Boiled shrimp
Midnight fast food runs
Bayou water skiing
Among the cotton mouths
Old Mozart’s boat
I jackknifed his trailer
Just a hair more sober than he
Smiling as he cussed
Petit Bois Island
Reeling in the blue fish
Mosquito Pterodactyls
Bombing with the sand fleas
Sleeping under the stars
Dreaming of conditioned air
Red Hot Chicken
Friday Night Football
Pizza time at Shakey’s
Drunken Winter Formals
Trusty flask of Jim Beam
Greg decked that poor dude
Quick right hook
Straight into the urinal
Old faithful
The Grey Ghost
Eight Track tunes
I mastered the stick shift
Cruising with a clutch
Boredom
My bitter nemesis
Such a giant world
Beyond Mobile Bay
Chess King Bell bottoms
Matching mood ring
Cold Bud at Fandango
Water turned to wine
As did stale urine
Behind the blue dumpster
Sand filled seaweed
Johnnie Winter riffs
Hot Tropics magic
Suburban existence
Ripping up the lip
Wiki Tan aroma
BLAB TV with Hound Dog
Young Tony Hawk
Slipping him some beers
What the hell said Tina?
“You’re crazy Billy Ray”
Buckets filled with rain
I love the rain my friends
Altered state of mind
Dreaming of the good old daze
Doesn’t bring them back
Still I’m pressing on
Rising from the dead again
Despite my brokenness
I’m grateful evermore
Kicking down the hidden door
Another lonely nocturne
My aging soul
Burns for completion


© Bill Grimes Jr. 2009

SAD HOLIDAY

5:44 am
Thunder clouds
Rock the peaceful stillness
July 4th has come and gone
Burnt paper aftermath
Wishing I could sleep
I guess I’ll write instead
Tried my hand at manhood
The child within still struggles
Dominating moodiness
Clinging to false hope
My thoughts reflect confusion
Painful destiny
Fierce
Wicked current
Burning intellect
Social disconnect
My shame burns so deeply
Such stark bewilderment
Daily futile visit
My inbox
Still empty
Your art of no reply
No longer reason why
If I’m not stimulated
Boredom simply rots me
Forced to grow each day
Or find another way
I’ve pulled away so many times
Only to be picked apart by guilt
I don’t know what to say
Never dreamed it would be this way
Shoot me now
Or drown me in your silence
It matters not to me
My eyes no longer see
This head shall soon explode
Surely split in two
I have no fear of death
But shall not force its hand
My focus
On true love
She’s screwed me every time
Dejection blows
I’m living proof
It rips away your mind
Leaves you weak and fetal
Survived to witness wonder
Died a thousand times
Wallowed in my misery
Crafted clever lines
Dancing on the outskirts of neurosis
Yet knowing the gist of right from wrong
My laughter has succumbed
No more tears to shed
I’ve got to quit this shit
No good can ever come from it
No longer willing to pretend
I crave numbing solace
Reached my bitter end
Or possibly
Beginning
Steeping in dejection
So many of you know me
Understand my gnawing need
To deal in brutal verity
Despite the awkward aftermath
Come this far on guts
I wish I were a coward
My urge
To withdraw
Travel deep within
Forsake the pantomime
Curl up with my prose
My how I love you girl
If only things were different
No blood is on your hands
For I’m the harlequin
No one else to blame
True love
A vicious game



© Bill Grimes Jr 2009

OUR SECRETS

Creighton
Skyline
Alpine Hills
Little League heroics
Music saturation
My childhood
A blur
Nostalgia laced synapse
Disarmed coherence
My life
An open book
For those who care to look
Sweet Pam
Gregory Paul
JJ
Dee Grisson
Such magical moments
“Play some Who… Billy Ray”
Rest in peace Timbo
Relax my sacred friends
Our secrets
Safely locked
Beyond my published grave
Psycho drunken daze
Hormonal machismo
Pops Party Palace
Teenage alter ego
Me
Rebellious acolyte
Human nature student
Rocket armed wordsmith
Hopeless romantic
Still searching for my muse
Times vicious march
Blistering impact
Reality
So brutal
I lick my wounds in silence
Still grooving to that different tune


© Bill Grimes Jr. 2009

RIDDLE

My sensitive words
At times
The enemy
Simmering emotions
Penetrating thoughts
Screaming to be free
Ponder eternity
Sad state of soul
Subtle revolution
True essence of a turning point
Fear of letting go
Wanting you to know
Then again
Not really
Sad discovery
Transparency
You already knew
Seeking solace for such loss
Reality
A cruel joke indeed
So this is how it goes
Depressions broken record
I’ve dreamed so long of bliss
Perhaps a mere mirage
Woke up this morning
A new day
Try another way
My poetry
A riddle
As it’s meant to be
Craft your own interpretation
And simply smile……


© Bill Grimes Jr. 2009

UNORTHODOX AFFAIR

I shaved my beard this morning
Symbolic rite of grief
Tale of separation
A love not meant to be
You pleaded with me not to leave
Yet I’m the one abandoned
Why
It’s not important now
This lie we have become
Hope fades in darkness
As dreams evaporate
Unorthodox affair
Romantic malnutrition
Perpetual mind games
Trumped by consequence
Heartache
Growing pains
Soul numbing sorrow
No reason to pretend
Fake it any longer
Harsh truth
Shackled spirit
Penetrating sting
Grand naivety
Destined to be fatal
So weary of the drama
Swinging pendulum
Orchestrated silence
Dreaded harbinger
Our friendship
Forged in hell
Full circle fate
No fond recollection
Much to my dismay
Blissful peaks
Far more brutal valleys
My patience
Now exhausted
At least I know the score
Crushing loneliness
Bridges burned by ego
Peace
Replaced by fear
Resentment
Disillusion
I’m grateful for the lesson
Despite such agony
Hardly worth such effort
Spiritual investment
My hungry heart
Unable
To flutter in uncertainty
Once I cared so deeply
Can’t feel it anymore
Safety net perhaps
Firewalled emotions
No honor in deception
Such a fool I’ve been
Clinging to false passion
Starry eyed façade
I’m strong this time
With purpose
Able to move on
I pray you find your answers
Wish you happiness


© Bill Grimes Jr. 2009

REHAB

A tear tattooed
Tortured face
Otherwise angelic
Before a painted smile
Deep foreboding secrets
Anguish lurks within
Distant loneliness
Fabricated stare
Prismatic demon dance
Storied fall from grace
Curled up with her nightmares
Longing for release
We mortals like to blame
Revel in another’s misery
So easy to imply
Temperamental friend
Thrust into celebrity
Lost credibility
Minstrel thoughts on rehab
Melodic cry for help
Trembling glass of port
Life’s shaky stage
Such fragile crescendo
Coffees getting cold


© Bill Grimes Jr. 2009

INTIMATE ASCENSION

Because of you sweet Mel
My soul swims with dolphins
My mind
Liberated
Music floods my senses
I float among the stars
Intricate emotions
Sacred symmetry
Intimate ascension
I peek into eternity
Savor every breath
Cherish every brilliant smile
On our journey to His light
My love for you
So natural
Incessant
Ageless adoration
Devotion
Simplicity
Deep significance
More than life itself
Know my heart is yours
Safe inside your gentle caress
I’ve always been a dreamer
It’s been you all along
My precious dream come true


© Bill Grimes Jr. 2009

GOOD NEWS CHILDREN

In sadness
Awe
Genuine excitement
I witness prophecy
Demons
Paranoia
Altered consciousness
Mental discomfort
Disturbing premonitions
Winds of brutal change
Howling violently
Across our insolent nation
Arrogant wasteland
Audacious disrespect
For each other
For our precious God
Secrets
Once so sacred
Dirty laundry now
Stars above
Clouded by poor judgment
So many wasted years
Crazy expectations
Insane proclivity
Dark reality
Human race gone mad
Good news children
Blessed hope remains
Faith in Him
Unseen
Almighty Holy Spirit
Consummate love
Faith
Now
More than ever
That’s good enough for me




© Bill Grimes Jr. 2009